Saturday, January 17, 2009


What a fabulous idea! (Are you allowed to use the word fabulous on a baseball blog? Ah well....) John Fay of the Cincinnati Enquirer has written a list of predictions, but it's not exactly what you think. He predicts what the Reds aren't going to do as the off-season progresses. Yes! I thought so too!

So sin más preámbulos, here's what I predict the Cardinals aren't going to do between now and, say, the beginning of Spring Training.

I'll start off with some easy ones.

(1) The Cardinals aren't going to bring Russ Springer back. Maybe this is cheating since they just officially announced it, but after reading his remarks, I think this will turn out to have been a mistake. However, as I may have mentioned before, no one ever asks me.

(2) The Cards won't sign any more middle infielders. Short is set. Second is all but set. The role of the utility man (formerly played by Supermiles) will now be played by someone who's already on the payroll. What with the salaries we have and the surplus of young talent, the only thing yet to be decided is how Tony's going to work 154 different lineups out of what he's got.

(3) The Cards won't bring back Izzy. As much as it saddens me to admit, I don't think Jason has a home in the organization anymore. I won't get up on my soap box right now, though. I'll spare you that.*

*This doesn't mean I'm ready to take his name off the roster, however.

(4) The Cards won't sign any of the big name free agents still on the market. Sheesh. Did I startle you with that one? If so, you haven't been paying attention. (Just to clarify, if the 'Birds do bring in another starter, it'll be someone nearly unheard of.*)

*I'm still hoping for Andy Pettitte, but I'm trying to be realistic here.

Now on to the harder stuff.

(5) The Cards won't sign Ankiel to a long-term contract. Even if he does get a one-year arb deal for more money than he made last year, he is (a) represented by the baby-eater, and (b) far too valuable for the likes of our outfield. Either he'll get traded for some pitching help, or this will be his last season with the club that grew him.

(6) The Cards won't designate a "closer". This will continue to be a sore spot with both management and fans, but lacking a veteran with big league closing experience, Tony will allow the duties to be split between Perez, Motte, and Franklin, much like last year.

(7) The Cards won't trade Schumaker. Ludwick had a spectacular season last year, and Ankiel is our own little living piece of history, but either of them is worth more than Skip overall. Therefore, his head is safe as long as the outfielder market isn't completely dried up.

(8) The Cards won't count out Carpenter until his arm literally falls off on the mound. And can't be sewn back on. Or duct taped. And he can't learn to pitch left-handed. You will never hear Mozeliak (even as prone as he is to choosing the wrong words) say that Carp is done unless he is really, truly, completely done. And by that I mean dead.

It's hard to imagine things going any more slowly, but I also know that there's still plenty of time, and it's not like the Cards haven't done anything. I'm just trying to stay awake.